30 weeks and 4 days.

Well today was one of those weird lazy but somewhat busy days. I woke up around 5AM because what’s sleep? I went on my phone for a bit but then I eventually turned the TV on and watched the news. Jesse had to wake up early for work today anyways so he eventually got up and started to get ready. I think I passed out around 6 or 6:30 and then didn’t wake up again until 9. I didn’t have any plans for the day but wanted to make a trip to Trader Joe’s so I ended up taking Wilson with me around 1. Have you guys heard of that seasoning blend called Everything but the Bagel? I hear so many people rave about it online so I decided to give it a try. I also heard about some Chickenless Orange Chicken that I wanted to try but I had no luck and they didn’t have any so I got the regular Orange Chicken to try out for dinner tonight. Lately I just haven’t been in the mood to eat or cook meat so we’ll see how this regular orange chicken turns out. I also got some cauliflower pizza crust that I’m excited to try for dinner tomorrow night. I plan on just making a cheese, olive, and pepperoni pizza and hopefully that turns out alright; I wanted a pizza that was relatively low carb and I’ve been wanting to try cauliflower crust pizza for a while now.

Baby moves around a lot still. He was pretty chill earlier but I got a coffee from Starbucks (tall iced coffee unsweetened with soy milk 😉 ) and that eventually kicked in and got him to move around more haha. I was just thinking earlier how I never drank coffee but now that I’m pregnant I see myself wanting it more. Why is that? So weird. I know I’m allowed to have about a cup or so a day, but I only have it every once in a while so I think it’s okay. Plus I always get a size tall, never more than that so I assume there isn’t much coffee in there anyways. The only symptoms I’ve had this past week are more headaches. Yesterday I woke up with one and it lasted all day long, which made me super lazy and just not feel well. I took a nap around 3pm and didn’t wake up until around 5. I know I mentioned being emotional in one of my last posts, which is still true to this week as well. I’m just one big ball of sensitivity! Help! Someone hold me and tell me I’m pretty (kidding).

Diabetes wise, I feel so alone. Being sick really messed me up and set me back, but I feel like I’m getting closer to my goals of having everything under control. I know I could email my doctors but to me there’s no point in doing that because only I know my body and their suggestions haven’t really worked much in the past so I figured I’d just figure it all out on my own. I’m still dealing with some high blood sugars but they haven’t been as bad the past couple of days. I’m trying to take things slow when adjusting insulin so I don’t run into any hypo’s again since that scared the crap out of me.

Welp, my baby shower is almost here! I’m getting excited and stressed out about it. I don’t know why I stress over it but I do. I shouldn’t be since I’m not the one decorating or setting things up but I’ve still been included in the decisions. I’m getting my hair done on Thursday and I also get my dress delivered on Thursday too and I’m praying my hair turns out good and my dress looks good on me. I’m usually not a dress person and I don’t like wearing dresses when I’m pale but we’re just going to roll with it. Hopefully it fits, too! If this dress doesn’t work out then I’m back to square one with deciding on what I’m going to wear. I know, such first world problems.

Anyways, I can’t think of anything else that’s new that has happened within the past week! It’s been pretty chill. We did get a new camera because I wanted a nice camera to take pictures of little one with once he’s here. I still have an iPhone 6 which doesn’t always have the best camera quality. The camera we got is nice because it has WiFi so all the photo’s I take I can send to my phone! I love it. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day for me because I’m meeting up with a few different people throughout the day. Don’t be fooled though, I’m really not that important and because I like to consider myself quite an introvert I already know I’m going to be wiped out after and will want to come home and decompress for like, a day and half haha.

And here’s a cute picture of my dog because why not? Don’t you just want to squeeze his cute face and give him all the kisses? No? Just me? 😂

28 weeks and 5 days.

Okay so a lot has happened within the past week since I last updated. Remember when I was telling you about Jesse being sick and I thought it was food poisoning? Yeah, no. I don’t think it was food poisoning because I got the exact same thing! My Wednesday morning was going great last week. Woke up, got ready and headed to Ross, Target, and even WalMart! Once I got home, I had lunch (which was leftover curry) and then I laid down for a bit. About two hours later my Dexcom went off saying I was low. I tested myself, my number was 66 so I figured it was the perfect time for a snack. Ate my frozen blueberries with goldfish, and continued to chill on the couch. My stomach started acting up and I was getting a bit nauseous but I thought nothing of it. My Dex went off again saying I was low and I thought that was really weird so I tested again and it was at 40! I used this time to eat a bunch of snacks thinking I’d just get high from it all and I could correct afterwards. I had gummy worms, girl scout cookies, goldfish, and juice. I mean WAY too many carbs to correct but I was feeling really crappy. I decided to go upstairs and lay down because I wasn’t feeling well. Jesse took Wilson out so I was home alone. I started getting extremely nauseous and was having that stomach ache. I felt like I couldn’t breathe or talk or move or do anything. I texted Jesse telling him he should come home. When he got here I tested myself again and I was STILL 40! I drank another juice and he called 911 but they tried transferring us on the phone (???) and were taking forever so Jesse hung up and decided to just drive me to the hospital instead, during traffic hours. Oy Vey. Once we were finally there, they took my blood sugar and it was 37. What the heck was happening?! I was pretty incoherent honestly and felt like I couldn’t talk. Didn’t want to talk to anyone and just wanted everyone to be quiet around me. I ended up vomiting in the ER room, like a lot. Gross (lets just say no more girl scout cookies for me for a while).

They eventually put me into this room to monitor baby’s heart rate, which was doing excellent. They were trying to figure out what was happening to me so they also tested me for the flu, which came back negative. I ended up having to stay in the hospital for four days! The first and last night there were probably the worst. I ended up throwing up again the first night. They had me hooked up to some fluids and also the baby heart rate monitor machine. The nurse that night wouldn’t let me lay on my sides because if I moved, I could move the heart rate machine and mess it up. I was so uncomfortable all night long, especially with him having to prick my fingers every single hour to check my blood sugars. By the way, their lancets are 10x more harsh than mine so all of my fingers have pretty much been through hell and look terrible. I didn’t use my own lancets because I didn’t have enough, and lets be real….what type 1 diabetic actually puts a new lancet on after every finger poke? Not me!

Day two in the hospital I woke up feeling a lot better but eventually started getting a small fever and felt terrible. You know, when you’re really cold but your body is super warm and your head just feels like it’s burning up?? Ugh. So they decided to keep me another night. I was lucky enough to have my mom sleep in the room with me for the first two nights. You might be wondering why I would want my mom instead of Jesse with me, and honestly, who doesn’t want their mom when they’re not feeling well?? I wanted Jesse at home to take care of the animals anyways.

Day three I was feeling a lot better but was also having pain in my stomach (also occurred on day two) and I felt extremely bloated and uncomfortable and whenever I tried to eat, I’d get really full really fast. Like, two bites in and I’d be done with my food. I brought this up to a few different nurses and one of them thought it was gas and others just kinda shrugged it off. But seriously, my stomach felt HUGE. When they weighed me I weighed 166! I was like, wait that can’t be right, how could I gain 10 pounds since the last doctor visit a week ago?? The nurse tried coming up with an explanation. Yea, sure, okay. I was hopeful to get good news that I’d be going home this day until my doctor came in and told me she wanted me to stay ANOTHER NIGHT because I hadn’t gotten my night time dose of insulin the night before and because my numbers were still running kind of low, she wanted me to be watched over night and be pricked every two hours (so fun). I cried. I just wanted to get the hell out of there. The bed was so uncomfortable and I had two IV’s in me and my arms hurt like hell. I was smelly, felt gross, my stomach hurt so bad I couldn’t lay on my sides anymore and they were telling me to eat more but I just couldn’t do it. Luckily during the night a nurse took me off of the fluids. I loved being free to walk to the bathroom without being connected to anything. This night was probably the second worst though because of how uncomfortable I was sleeping. I was hot, but cold, my stomach was huge. I felt gross. I just wanted to go home. I slept alone this night. Woke up around 2AM and couldn’t sleep. Eventually went to sleep but then woke up again around 5 or 6 and just laid there because a nurse came in dragging a scale into the room. Why she would drag this heavy clanky thing into my room at this hour I have no idea, but it pissed me off because it woke me up and I couldn’t go back to sleep. I didn’t want anyone with me that night because I knew how uncomfortable the couch was and I felt bad when my mom had to sleep on it. But I wished someone was with me because it sucked being alone feeling like crap. It was a shitty time.

Day four I was even more hopeful of going home. I mean, this had to be the day right? How much longer did they need me there? Every day that I was there, they did lab work and drew blood in the mornings. My parents came to visit me in the morning and my doctor eventually called me on the phone and said she had good news and bad news. The good news was that my blood sugars were doing a lot better, enough for them to figure out how much to start giving me and figured out a ratio for me to work with when I have my meals. The bad news was that my red blood cell count had lowered a lot since being there. They wanted to run some tests and figure out what was going on but couldn’t draw my blood again until 6pm that night and the results would take about an hour. Since I wasn’t bleeding out from anywhere, she was worried it could be internally. Talk about scary as sh*t. Yeah, I cried. Again. I was scared blood was just accumulating inside me and thats what was causing my bloated stomach or that I was hurting my baby somehow.  But I couldn’t do anything about it and had to wait until 6pm to have my blood drawn. So another day spent at the hospital. At least this time I was able to walk around and they told me it would be good for me. They had a little outdoor patio that when Jesse came to visit me, we walked and hung out outside so I could get fresh air. I had him bring me clothes to shower and change and just feel better. I felt a lot better this day despite the bad news. I was trying to stay positive. My body was so swollen from laying down for so long. When I walked I felt like I was a giant whale going down the hallway. I waddled. Literally waddled down the hall. My feet, ankles, thighs, everything was swollen. Once we were done spending time outside I went back into my room to visit with my brother. I started feeling weird again, possibly standing too much. I pee’d like a madman that day since all of the fluids were finally coming out of me. My stomach started to feel much better, too. Turns out, my stomach was so bloated from all of those fluids! At least that’s what I think because I was starting to feel much more comfortable. Anyways, 6pm rolls around and no one shows up from the lab to draw my blood. They showed up an hour late, but I was so excited to get my blood drawn I couldn’t be that upset.

An hour later and a doctor came into the room, smiling, and told us that all the nurses had been saying how bad I wanted to go home (did I make it that obvious?) and so she wanted to be the one to give me the good news. Good. News. My red blood count had risen enough for me to go home and her thought was that the fluids I was on is what dropped it in the first place. My aunt who worked in the medical field had told my mom this earlier in the day so I was hoping that this is what could be happening to me. Thank you Jesus! They prescribed me some Iron and sent me on my way home, at 9pm! You have no idea how happy I was to finally be going home. Look, I know I wasn’t dying or anything but this whole experience was shitty especially being pregnant. I was so scared, and exhausted too.

Sunday went well, with me getting tired really quickly but it was OK. Once the night came though, I suddenly got extremely nauseated and had a stomach ache again. I for sure thought I’d be going back to the hospital and yeah, I cried again. What the hell was wrong with me?? I never threw up but I spent a good amount of time in the bathroom just sitting there trying to throw up. Eventually I went to bed but kept a bag next to me just in case. On Monday I had a doctors appointment and I was lucky that Jesse offered to take me just in case something happened or I didn’t feel good while driving. During my visit we just went over diabetes related stuff and I told them about my nausea and being tired. They prescribed me anti nausea meds and also took me off of the Iron pills because the rest of my labs came back normal so there was no need to be on Iron. I went home, tried to eat lunch, took a nap and just lounged around honestly. I stayed in bed until about 5pm. By the way, if you’re still reading this far into my post, baby was doing great the entire time and seemed to be unaffected by all of what was going on with me. Tuesday I felt the same where I’d get bursts of energy, do something, and then be exhausted afterwards and be a bit queasy too with having a little appetite. I only took the nausea meds the day I was given them. Luckily I just pushed through yesterday and then today I haven’t felt nauseated at all or tired! I feel like myself today and it feels amazing. The weather has been great and it’s so nice to sit outside and just relax and just be grateful that me and baby are OK. This situation could have been worse. I really hope I don’t have to lay in that hospital bed until I’m ready to give birth. Being pregnant and sick is absolutely terrible. Throw in diabetes, or any other disease or illness and it’s even worse.

If you’ve read this far, congrats! I didn’t know I’d be writing such a long post. I have my 3rd trimester ultrasound tomorrow and I am SO excited to see my little one! Oh yeah, and if your curious about the weight thing, I dropped down to 158 at my last appointment on Monday. Which seems to be a good weight to be at right about now. I knew there was no way I could weigh 166 right now. Thats just crazy! Well, I’m feeling better, no more bloat or swollen feet, my health seems to be doing good, and I’m happy. I’ll post an update next week and hopefully it won’t be a crazy one like this one!

15 weeks and 6 days.

I write pretty sporadically on this blog. Especially since I’ll be 16 weeks tomorrow, lol. This past week has brought me a bigger bloated belly and a couple days of dull nausea followed by pure exhaustion. It has only happened a couple of times, thankfully. I feel like work has been pretty cray lately (physically and emotionally) so I’ve been really tired by the time I’m off. I could not wait to have today off to finally relax my mind and body a bit, even though I’ve been running around doing things.

This morning I had to go and do my second trimester blood tests to prepare for the ultrasound I’ll be having in December. After that I then went and did a little grocery shopping so I could make dinner tonight (yay for tacos!), came home to eat lunch, and then visited my nana in the hospital *insert sad face emoji here*. I hate hospitals. Before I became diabetic I actually wanted to have my baby at a birthing center and try to be natural as in no epidural no nothing! I didn’t want to be hooked up to machines at all. If you’ve seen the documentary “The Business of Being Born” then you’d probably have second thoughts about hospitals, too. I’m totally not hating on women who prefer hospital births or have/prefer c-sections either. But if you haven’t seen that documentary then I think you should! It’s pretty interesting. Also, I am aware that shit happens and I really don’t think trying to plan how you’re going to give birth is the smartest idea because then if things don’t go your way you can end up being a crazy nervous wreck. That’s just my take on it, advice from someone who’s never gone through this before so I’m pretty much just talking out of my ass lol.

Anyways, back to my pregnancy and diabetes to conclude this post (I’m currently catching up on Riverdale so my attention is more focused on that at the moment, sorry bout it). I’m getting more excited about having a baby. It’s pretty scary when you’re considered high risk so I’m always a little nervous about everything. I’m hoping I’ll find out the sex on the 20th. I know a lot of women get the early ultrasound and pay extra for it but I have doctor appointments every 3 weeks! I get ultrasounds every time so I’m just going to wait until that appointment to find out. I guess that’s one cool thing about being high risk, lots and lots of ultrasounds of little one 🙂 Diabetes is not kicking my ass this week! I’ve had amazing nights of sleep with no interruptions! My blood sugar stays steady around 70-90 all night. During the day it’s also pretty good. I will have lows at work sometimes if I wait too long to take my break, so those are always important to take in my case. My snacks always include fruit (an apple or a cutie) and something else. Sometimes it’s a piece of pepper jack string cheese or a small bag (15g) of pretzels. With Halloween I had a bit too much candy but I try to keep it in moderation. I’m pretty happy with how my health has been but I know it’ll change up on me again so I just have to watch out for that. Well, I hope I’ll be able to write a bit sooner in my 16 weeks!

 

 

Family.

I was able to spend time with some family today that I don’t get to see often. Unfortunately we were brought together due to a death in the family. My uncle passed away last night. To be honest, I didn’t see him very often but of course I loved him. I always remember him being a quiet but very sweet man. I saw him a few weeks ago and he couldn’t talk but when he saw me he got this big smile on his face and put his arm out to hug me. I can’t help but feel so sad for my aunt during this time. I’m so glad he’s not suffering anymore, but I know this will be so hard for her. To be with someone since you were 17 years old and having them as your best friend and partner in life and then losing them seems…..more awful than I can even put into words. I’ve been with my boyfriend since I was 17 and I just couldn’t imagine the heartache that would bring me if I were to lose him. My best friend. I love my aunt so much. She’s one of the best people I have in my life. The most supportive and understanding person. You could tell her anything about yourself and she would never judge you. And not to mention she gives the best back scratches.

Being around my cousins today just made my day honestly. It sucks that we were brought together today because of something sad, but I also think it’s special because even if we don’t see each other at all, we’re able to come together as a family and be there for each other. I love all of my cousins. Playing with the little ones was so fun, and tiring. Maybe because i’m pregnant and tired, but most likely because i’m lazy lol. I loved seeing my second cousins who are the oldest. They are gooorgeouss and so smart and ugh, I wish I had spent more time with them. That’s the shitty part about living kinda far. I mean, it’s really only a couple of hours but when you’re a teenager you don’t always think about seeing your family who lives far from you. Now that i’m older I wish things were different.

My family is kind of a big ball of…a somewhat mess. I won’t go into full detail but things aren’t always easy for everyone. I’m sure every family has their drama and issues but stubbornness definitely runs deep into my family. Once you piss someone off, you could be cut off for life. Personally, I’m not that way. At least I try not to be, but if someone wants to cut me out, I’m not one to chase after them either. If you hurt me bad enough and aren’t willing to communicate to resolve the problem then I’ll stay gone. Is that bad? I don’t know, but that’s just how I deal with that kind of situation.

Anyways, I am 10 weeks and 2 days today. The only symptoms so far are gas (TMI, sorry, but everything seems to make me fart. lol), and the nausea is coming back but only at certain times so it’s not an all day thing like it was before. I can’t really think of anything else at the moment. I have another doctor appointment on Wednesday so I can’t wait to see my little one bigger and hopefully measuring perfectly.

I’ll update when I can!

 

Vegan Chili.

I thought I’d post a recipe since I actually cooked today! Before being pregnant, I cooked almost every single night. Cooking is like my go-to therapy and I just love creating yummy dishes or recreating recipes I find on good old Pinterest.

Anyways, the idea of Chili came from my boyfriend eating a hotdog with chili for dinner the other night and I tried a bite of the Chili and was like, hmmmmmm ok ok I can dig this! Usually I’m not a big Chili fan so I don’t make it often.

THE RECIPE (that I made up on my own because Pinterest failed me and nothing looked good to me on there)

  • 1 package of Boca’s Beefless Crumbles (or use 1 pound of Ground beef, or omit this entire ingredient)
  • 1/2 an Onion, white or yellow, chopped
  • 1/2 Green Bell Pepper, choppped
  • 1/2 Red Bell Pepper, chopped
  • 3 Garlic Cloves, minced
  • 2 tbsp Chili Powder
  • 1 tbsp Cumin
  • 1 tsp Oregano
  • 1/4 tsp Cayenne Pepper (or more if you like heat)
  • Salt
  • 1 4oz can diced Green Chili’s
  • 1 can Diced Tomatoes
  • 1 can Kidney Beans
  • 1 can Black Beans
  • 3/4 cup Frozen (or canned) Corn
  • 1 tbsp Tomato Paste
  • 2 cups of Water
  1. Heat some olive oil in a large pot on medium high heat, add your beefless crumbles or ground beef. Cook completely. If using the ground beef, make sure to drain. Place meat aside for later.
  2. Add more olive oil into your now empty pot and add your garlic and veggies. Sprinkle some salt and sauté until softened. Once softened, add your meat back into the pot. Add your spices + a bit more salt and stir to incorporate. Add your canned goods, corn, tomato paste, and 2 cups of Water.
  3. Bring to a boil then simmer for 40-60 minutes. Taste, add more salt if needed. Serve and Enjoy 🙂

I hope someone tries this recipe out because I personally thought it was packed with flavor and everything went so well together. If you don’t have any beefless meat or real meat on hand feel free to leave out that ingredient/step completely. I almost didn’t even use it but since it’s been in my freezer I decided to just use it up.

Use what you have on hand! If you don’t have black beans, use pinto! If you only have one bell pepper, just use that one. If you’re lucky enough to have a jalapeño on hand, mince that up really good and throw that in there as well! I served my chili with saltine crackers to be a bit more low in carb but obviously if you have the time to make corn bread, that would make this 10x better!

Insulin.

Ugh, the thing that keeps me alive but also makes my life really hard these days! I’m talking about insulin adjustments during my pregnancy. I have recently been having the worst nights sleeping lately because my Dexcom will go off multiple times alerting me that I am having a low blood sugar. Most of the time I don’t feel symptoms so I ignore it. I also doing something really terrible, I will put in a fake glucose reading just to keep it from going off. I know I know, thats really bad. Please don’t tell my doctor, lol. I will however wake up once I get symptoms: sweating, hunger, my brain feeling all weird and fuzzy. I keep snacks in my nightstand to help. Lots of little candies!

I started lowering my bed time insulin dose last week I believe. I started out with 11 units of Lantus pre pregnancy and now, tonight, I am taking 8 units before bed. After the past few days of still continuing to have lows, I decided to lower it another unit. I am not sure what took me so long? I feel like I should have lowered it another unit like, yesterday. Oh well. Let’s see how tonight goes.

Once I wake up from my phone going off a million times, I’ll lay in bed awake for about an hour until I can fall asleep again. And then I have to pee. And then I actually get that low my phone was telling me about so I have to force myself to eat a candy even though I’m too tired to actually chew (weird, I know). And then I have to pee again. Listen, I’m using this blog to track everything I am going through. Although I am extremely blessed I even get to experience pregnancy, I am also extremely tired of having diabetes. It sucks especially when I want to just eat 5 chocolate chip cookies as a snack. Or eat an entire pint of Talenti’s Vanilla and Caramel Swirl ice cream. Ugh, diabetes probs.

Also, update on the nausea and food aversions. They’re still here. Torturing me. The meds help with the nausea a bit but they don’t take the food aversions away. I can honestly only eat what I crave and I only crave things that I see other people eat or that I hear someone mention. Example: earlier today my mom mentioned sushi so I of course, HAD to have Japanese for lunch. Beef Teriyaki for the win!

I’m going to try to post once a week so I’ll get back to you once I’m 9 weeks!

7 Weeks and 6 Days.

Almost 8 weeks. 8. Freakin. Weeks.

It’s been tough, not gunna lie guys. This nausea is kicking my ass. I almost wish I could throw up to just get rid of it. Today I actually woke up quite fine and I had peppermint tea with my breakfast and didn’t have much nausea until after lunch. It has been downhill from there. I emailed my doctor yesterday and she got back to me today and told me she would prescribe me some meds to help so I’ll have to pick them up next week since work gets in the way of the times I’m available and the pharmacy is open :/ bummer. I want them asap.

Other symptoms are sense of smell. I can’t remember if I’ve already mentioned this before but I didn’t think I had a heightened sense of smell until I noticed my dogs breath suddenly smells like he ate a fresh pile of sh!t. I asked my boyfriend if he thinks his breath smells that bad and he told me it was just me *shrugs*. Also, doing the dishes is really hard for me to do if there’s any sort of smell. I’ve been trying to avoid cleaning them but so has my boyfriend so I end up getting stuck doing them anyways lol. My plan clearly doesn’t work.

Food. I have no real appetite unless I smell something really good that I have to have. I still eat of course. My dinners have been extremely carb heavy because it’s all I ever feel like eating. Mexican food, pasta, rice, etc. But I still manage to keep my numbers in check! So that’s good. I’ve recently had tests done and my A1C dropped even lower to 4.8! I really want to feel better so I can get back to cooking and eating better. Veggies just never sound good anymore. I’ve actually been loving fruit. I bought raspberries, blueberries, blackberries, wAtermelon, plums, and nectarines over the weekend! The berries are my fave. I make sure to eat them at certain times and obviously limit my portion to control my blood sugars.

Work seems to be kicking my butt. I’m usually exhausted after work and during work I feel like complete crap because of the nausea. I feel bad for anyone who asks how I’m doing because the answer is always the same. I also feel bad like I’m not doing the best that I can because of lack of energy and just feeling sick. I hate to complain all the time, I know a lot of other women have it 10x worse. But for me this is my struggle right now.

Anyways, I can only hope this icky stuff disappears soon! I’m looking forward to being happy and enjoying this pregnancy before I can’t see my feet anymore.

Liz