8 Weeks.

I totally wrote an entire blog post on my computer and tried to copy and paste from my phone onto here and it wouldn’t work 🙃 so here’s me writing everything all over again! Well, from scratch actually because I can’t remember everything I said before.

8 weeks! The nausea is REAL. It comes in waves. One day I’ll be okay and the next it’s pretty much debilitating and I can’t do anything but lay down. Getting up to pee a million times in the middle of the night is the new norm. Food aversions like no freakin other!! Just the words of many foods make me want to throw up. Can’t say them, can’t hear them! The only foods I can consistently eat are smoothie bowls, overnight oats, fruit of all sorts, and crackers/chips. When it comes to meals, each day is different. I can’t eat the same meal twice which means I hardly cook and we eat out a lot. I have also been getting headaches every now and then. Still getting out of breath, too.

I feel like I’m growing already because I’m so bloated all the time and I just feel so uncomfortable in my clothes. It sucks because it’s getting to my head. I’m obviously a bigger person now than when I got pregnant with Levi, 3 years ago. I fear I won’t be able to lose the baby weight this time around since I couldn’t do it last time. Body acceptance is so hard when everyone else looks amazing after having kids. Well, everyone on social media. It’s so incredibly hard not to compare myself. I took a good break from Instagram and I felt myself getting happier so I think I need to do it again.

Anyways, I was really nervous with this pregnancy and couldn’t stop thinking about losing it. I had an appointment last week and saw the heartbeat and it made me feel so much better. Also the constant nausea is pretty reassuring, too. I have another appointment next week that I am excited for! It’s been hard for the doctors to really tell how far along I am because baby hardly shows up on the ultrasound since it’s so small. For sure I’m estimating 8 weeks this week since I was 7 last week when they measured.

Okay let’s talk diabetes! So my blood sugars have actually been quite good in my opinion! Besides the week that I was sick (those blood sugars were extremely stubborn!), I’ve been doing well. Im working with an amazing amazing nurse who checks on me weekly to update my insulin pump settings! Seriously, I thought I had good doctors last time with Levi but I think I have even better ones this time around. With Levi’s pregnancy I felt like I did everything on my own…and maybe that’s why I didn’t get much help? I’m not sure. I meet my high risk doctors at the end of the month so I’m sure I’ll be in good hands then, too!

After next weeks appointment I plan on telling more family members about being pregnant. I’ve just been enjoying keeping it to myself just because I’ve been paranoid. But the most beautiful thing happened to me two days ago, a ladybug landed on me! You might be thinking I’m crazy but once Jesse saw it and told me it was stuck in my hair, I immediately filled with joy and it’s like this wave of happiness just went over me. It’s like I *knew* everything was going to be alright. Ladybugs have always brought me good luck and usually are a sign that I will get whatever it is that I’m asking for. And I’ve been asking for a healthy, viable, pregnancy.